when i waz in my younger dayz, i new tat i waz adopted, so when i grew up in my teens i always think negative abt my real mom, i always thought tat she di'nt loved me,n her only main concern waz on my half sistez n brotherz, as i grew older, i realized, she waz not in the wrong 2 give me up 4 adoption, but deep in my heart, i still fill hurt, with wut she did, but i kept it 2 myself n vent my angerness on her. after years gone by when i'm in my aged tat i can accept reality,n when i listen n heard wut my aunties stories abt the truth behind my moms doing, i felt sry 4 her,i 4give her, but in my heart only. my mistake till nw is i still could not accept the reality even though i noe it was not her mistake to give me away. until last year i waz still not closed to her like mother n daughter should b. even when she waz vry sick, i did'nt pay her a visit, tat waz my biggest mistake, until 27th of september 2007, she passed away, without me by her bedside. tat day waz thursday n i waz totally flat, i waz vry sick n waz resting, there were no phone only my pc, my sis send a message but i did'nt check my mails as i waz really vry sick, until when at over 5 pm, i waz feling uneasy, when i on my pc, i received the bad news. i regreted my whole life of wut happened n i cried non stop n i noe its 2 to late, even if I cry blood, my mom would nvr come back.......MAK....if u could listen upthere...... PLZZZ FORGIVE MY SINS.............
In 1967, year tat i was born, my adopted parents took me in to b in thier family n so i was with them until they passed away. let me say tat they r liked my real parents even though they r my adopted.my dad passed away in 1991, 6th of june, it was a great lose to me, i loved him so much,tat i cried myself to sleep n then again in 1993, august 30th. my beloved mom,passed away leaving me to b all alone. i have 5 adopted sistez above me n a adopted big brother, but after my parents passed away,i was no more welcome in tat family n i was a total stanger in tat family, here i 1 2 say is, its not my intention to let out the black sheep but to share with everyone my sad sad story. as it is a memory to me to remember my loving parents
IBU..........JIKA MASA DAPAT DI PUTAR KAN,
INGIN SEKALI KU PUTAR KANNYA
KEMBALI PADA ZAMAN SILAM DI MANA
AKU DAN KAU BERSAMA.
IBU........TAK DE APE YG DAPAT KU UCAP KAN
MELAINKAN KERIDUAN KU TERHADAP MU IBU......
IBU....TIDAK DISANGKA DAN TIDAK DI DUGA
IBU PERGI BUAT SELAMA-LAMANYA
TANPA MENGUCAPKAN SELAMAT TINGGAL KEPADA KU
IBU........
SESUNGGUHNYA AKU MASIH MERINDUI....
KASING SAYANG......BELAIAN.....
PELUKAN DAN CUIMAN DARI MU............
IBU.......
JIKA KAU BISA MENDENGAR.........
KELUHAN HATIKU........
INGING SEKALI AKU MENJERIT NAMA MU
BERIBU DAN BERULANG KALI.....
IBU.....
SESUNGGUHNYA AKU MASIH MERINDUIMU
IBU........
BILA KU SAKIT TERLANTAR
RUPANY KAU PERGI BUAT SELAMANYA
TANPA AKU DI SISI MU
MEMISAHKAN AKU DAN ENGKAU........
IBU...........
SEKALI LAGI DARI HUJUNG RAMBUT
HINGGA KE HUJUNG KAKI
AKU INGIN SEKALI MEMINTA AMPUN DAN MAAF
ATAS SEGALA DOSA DOSA KU TERHADAP MU
SESUNGGUH NYA TIADA SIAPA
YG TAU......JAUH DI LUBUK HATI......
KAU MASIH DALAM INGATAN KU
KAU MASIH DI HATI DAN JIWA KU.......
IBU........
TIADA APA DAN TIADA SIAPA YG DAPAT
MENGANTIKAN DAN MENANDINGI DIRIMU........
IBU........
HADIRLAH DALAM MIMPI Ku
SESUNGGUHNYA AKU MENRINDUI MU..........
DARI ANAK MU............
SEMOGA ALLAH MENGAMPUNI DOSA DOSA MU
DAN MELETAKKAN MU DISISI NYA.........
SEKIAN KU DOAKAN MU DENGAN ALFATIHAH AMIN........
